Emergency Take-Off!

This last weekend was an exciting one, but not by any means pleasant in the nature of excitement.

I had always thought (inaccurately) that the greatest threat was to my Uncle, being the owner of the Chevrolet and the Model-A that have occasionally found their way into the pictures on this site. Those two vehicles have been on the property for a great while and had gotten the attention of the city before.

Nevertheless, we had resolved to assemble the Volkswagen completely by the end of the weekend as pressure from the city had been increasing. It was a pay-day weekend and we got a great deal accomplished. The body was back on, the motor was working, and the suspension was nearly complete. However, the glass had not been installed yet, the wiring was not completed, and the doors, bonnet, and engine cover were still off. Still, we were in no panic.

When Monday came, I went early to the DMV to get a temporary registration, which is required to operate the vehicle without an inspection certificate, license, or registration. All went smoothly and I made great time for having gone to the DMV in Salt Lake (There are only two offices in the entire area).

I came home to start work again, only to be interrupted at midday by a gentleman with a very large clipboard and an official looking truck. He proceeded to write on his clipboard, at which point he informed us that we had failed to comply with city ordinance and we were looking at a criminal record adjoined by a fine up to $1800 and/or short-term imprisonment. This was not pleasing.

It was quite unnerving the conversation which took place. There was some discussion about warnings and specificity of the violation, culpability, leniency, and so forth. However, the only lead way was made when I made reference to the registration that I had obtained that very morning. I informed the gentleman, quite boldly and without the slightest doubt in my own words, that I planned on having the car inspected this very day.

He looked keenly at the disorder of my motorized transport and responded, with equal confidence, and perhaps a bit of disdain as well, that he would gladly forget the ticket had ever been written if I, in fact, did have an inspected, running vehicle by 7:00 AM the next day, at which time he arrived at his office.

He left. Then the realization occurred to me that no inspection team would be working before 7:00 AM the next morning nor would they be working after 7:00 PM that very day. This is not among my favorite of dramatic conclusions reached by myself.

Working as fast as possible, the wiring was completed, the glass was installed, the doors, bonnet, and engine cover were placed, and the gasoline tank was filled. What we did not have were one horn and working brakes -- the 6V horn had been fried and I had pulled the brake line from the master cylinder, causing the entire system to suddenly have the need to have excess air removed from its innards.

It was 7:00 PM. I had found, with a great deal of luck, that Jiffy Lube was open until 7:30 and that they welcomed anyone for inspections as long as they were still open. With the help of a nearby neighbor (who is presently working on a Ghia), the car was completely and I rolled into Jiffy Lube at 7:29 PM.

The following morning, Tuesday, I informed the man with the clipboard by telephone of the miracle which had occurred. I then proudly went to the nearest Department of Motor Vehicles to obtain one shiny new license plate, one certificate of registration, and two colorful stickers to decorate said plate.

The moral of the story is, 'It is wise only for a fool to bluff the executor of the law.'